Karma, It's a Bitch

Jer's days "off" this week consisted of getting home around 9 Wednesday morning and not having to go into work until early Saturday morning.  The plan for Wednesday was to have him sleep a few hours, wake up to eat lunch and spend 2 hours with the girls and I until the girls go down for naps, sleep for 3 more hours, wake up to eat supper, do the night time routines, put girls to bed, go back to bed himself.  On these days, where he has to transition from being a night owl to normal human behavior in 24 hours, he's generally grumpy, worthless and a big ball of DAMN IT, JEREMY, YOU BUMP ON A LOG, YOUR IN MY WAY!, but the girls climb all over him like they haven't seen him in 7 days, which is pretty true, and I get a short reprieve. 

Anyway-- I had a point.

Instead of him waking up a few times throughout the day to spend time with the girls.... he SLEPT FOR 10 HOURS STRAIT and didn't wake up until I opened the bedroom door to let the poor, starved dogs out of the room and then SLAMMED it shut.  And by slammed shut, I should note that MY version of slamming a door probably isn't the same as yours.  I'm used to Jer sleeping odd hours all the time so it's become second nature to me to close a door without so much as making a latching sound.  But this time I shut the door with the intention of him hearing me, so I wiggled the door handle on the way in and closed it with the noisy click clicks that usually accompany a closing door.

Because I'm a sweet, sweet wife like that.

No, no, don't jump into his corner and feel sorry for him, yet.  He was only conscious for 2 hours and then proceeded to sleep soundly the rest of the night.  The girls even slept late in the morning for him!

Why my sour mood?  Well, for one, I was totally jealous because WHEN IN THE HELL DO I GET MY CHANCE TO SLEEP ALL FUCKING DAY AND NIGHT WITH NO CHILDREN PESTERING ME?  I mean, he just had that for 3 weekends strait while the girls and I were on our road trip, how much more sleep does he need?

Secondly, Lydia had been an absolute pill the entire day and was sporting some pretty frequent and pretty wet diapers all day.  And by wet, I don't mean it was made by urine.  Though it might as well have been, if you get my drift.

Usually when we get those kinds of diapers, they are followed with horrendous rashes and fierce screams.  Neither which happened.  So I couldn't figure out what we had fed her that made her have a grumpy temper and the runs.

Thursday morning, about 4am, I found out what her problem was.  I thought I was GOING TO DIE.  I was alternating between hot 'n sweaty to cold 'n clammy.  My lower abdomen was in so much pain I was sure my IUD broke loose and was slicing it's way through my uterus.  And the nausea, oh dear Lord, the nausea.  I wanted to vomit, yet, I couldn't even make myself gag.  I was MISERABLE.

And now this totally explains Lydia's mood and bodily functions the day before. 

The good thing about Jeremy's 22 hour sleep session was that he was totally capable of taking care of the girls while I laid in bed all day-- wishing for death.  Apparently, this is what jealousy gets you.

Karma is a bitch.