Or so I'm hoping.
You see. I'm as large as the broad side of a barn. And in noticing this these past few weeks, it now comes as no surprise to me because I'm hungry all. the. fucking. time. Generally its a common thought that when you've begun eating the entire contents of the refrigerator... you're going to to get fat. Quickly.
Breakfast- I force myself to eat.
Lunch- usually either skipped or is very light.
Snack- makes up for the slack during lunch time.
Dinner- FULL PLATE.
Dessert- might as well be another meal in itself.
11 o'clock munchies- why in the hell am I still starving to death?
3am pee break- seriously, I am not going to get something to eat at this hour because I'll never get back to sleep. But damn am I still hungry.
Breakfast- do I seriously have to eat breakfast?
It is because of this awful eating habit I can no longer see my feet. I also can't seem to keep my belly covered with any maternity shirt that claims to be a medium. I like to claim it has much more to do with the fact that all my medium shirts have all-of-a-sudden shrunk length wise and has absolutely nothing to do with my enormous eating abilities between the hours of noon and 3am. Although this shrinking shirt theory could also be linked to the fact that the Termite has apparently decided to drop as my belly does not seem to be encroaching on the boobies' space anymore.
The OB said last week that I am past the point of stopping labor should my body decide to truly love me and go a little early. Knowing this, I'm hoping maybe my dropping belly and engorged eating habits may be a sign that I'll be going a bit early.
With Kyra I started eating everything in sight about two weeks prior to and my belly dropped 3 days before D-Day. I'm crossing my eyes, fingers and toes hoping maybe these are signs. Maybe my body truly loves me and will pop within the next few days/weeks.
But then again, I know better; Kyra was estimated to be 2-3 weeks late when she finally came into the world. Knowing that, I'm certain my body has no idea what the term "labor" really means until every millimeter of space is fully occupied by the fetus and, with that, I am also certain there are still a few more centimeters here and there. I have no doubt I won't be throwing my legs in the air to push any time soon.
So I guess there is nothing else to do but continue to get fatter by eating everything in sight. Maybe if my stomach gets engorged enough with food, my uterus will have no other choice but to push the expendable fetus out into the world.
Until that happens, any other ideas as to how I could induce labor naturally? Lets just go ahead and take sex and laxatives off the table. Can we come up with something a little less traumatic?