Wednesday, August 12, 2009

All Thanks to Network Befriending

I'll let you all in on a little secret. When I was younger I had a nickname, Lici. Short for Alicia. Now I can't figure out, why, for the life of me, someone along the way decided that if they cut off both of the A's in my name, this was either cuter or simpler. It's ugly. And stupid. And I hate that name with every fiber of my being.

Most people in my life call me Alicia. And I answer. But those who call me Lici, well, I tend to roll my eyes at them before I ever address them back.

In second grade, my teacher asked if any of us had a nickname we used versus our actual name. This was new territory for me, being allowed to pick my own name and what not, so I offered my "Lici" up as my new name. It was that year that I decided it was the worst possible name ever bestowed upon me. It was worse then my middle name, which as a kid I absolutely despised because whenever it was used, it meant I was in deep shit.

From there on out, everyone I met or came in contact with I introduced myself as Alicia. Those who called me Lici picked it up from hearing my immediate family use it.

Using this method, I've come to know who my real friends are. If you call me Lici, I'll know that you probably don't mean shit to me because I didn't bother to correct you, and if you did mean shit to me in the past, I've more then likely told you I hate that name and you continued to use it anyway. So I mark you off my list of "important people in my life."

So take the fucking hint Mom, Dad, Brother, and Grandmother whom I absolutely adore.

I tell you this to tell you about why I hate myspace and facebook, despite the fact that I absolutely love them, still.

With myspace and facebook everyone who ever sat behind you in study hall comes tramping back into your life. Whether you were particularly fond of them or not.

So this one chic, who still refers to me as Lici, has found me on both sites. (I'll just keep referring to her as This Chic, you know, just for anonymity purposes) I'm not enemies with her, I just once knew her in my younger I'll be your best friend even when you talk about me behind my back days. It only took a few years for me to get over that friendship and realize it was a crock of shit.

Anyway! I'm totally over it, I SWEAR!

So This Chic posted a picture oh, I don't know, a day or so ago on facebook of her son's head which is sporting the largest and biggest goose egg I have ever seen. He acquired such a mark from falling off his bike.... while not wearing a helmet. I, what I thought, jokingly suggested she get the kid a helmet, but apparently sarcasm doesn't come through in my typing. Even though within the sarcasm was a true, concerned suggestion on my part. This Chic wrote back saying that her 7 year old does own two helmets and he's strong willed enough that he didn't feel the need to wear them while riding his bike in the yard.

Ooooookay, to each his own, I guess.

Now This Chic posts her hourly update about how a "friend"- that being me!- got up on her motherly high horse (not her exact words, but I forget EXACTLY what insult she called me) and was telling This Chic how to raise her children even though the "friend"- once again, that's me!- has (a) less children then This Chic and (b) younger children then This Chic. To which my mouth dropped open and I promptly deleted her from my friends because, HELLO!, get a clue, right?

I mean, I too have a strong willed child (don't we all?), however, there are basic rules and if you don't want to follow the rules, um, you can forget about participating in the activity. Here's a rock and a stick, keep both feet on the ground and don't start trouble. Now, HAVE FUN!

So my point of this post is four part:
1. If you refer to me as Lici, I am probably not your friend. Someone you once knew, yes, but not your friend.
2. Is it just me or does the basic principal rule of "if you want to ride your bike and you are under the age of 18 while PLAYING (nope, you don't even have to live here for that rule to be implemented) at my house you WILL wear a helmet" stand firm at your homes to?
3. Do you have to be on a Motherly High Horse to suggest something that to most seems like common sense?
4. Just because you have younger and/or fewer offspring, does this make you any less smart in the whole "parenting" department of life?

I'd just like to know so that if I'm the one who is out of line here, you know, I'm not above apologizing. But from my view point, looking both over and under my high horse, I just don't get This Chic.


  1. No, you were not out of line. If I let my child ride his bike without a helmet and he hurts himself, AND I then post evidence of that on Facebook, I would assume that someone would post a comment about a helmet. I would expect it. And I certain wouldn't take offense to it. I'm not sure what she expected when she posted a photo of her injured child and explained it was because she didn't make him wear a helmet.

    And it gets on my nerves when people post passive-aggressive comments about someone, instead of addressing that person directly. It's immature.

  2. Amen to Lindsey and Alicia. You did the right thing Alicia. I am more proud at the fact you deleted her. Shame on her for being such a brat!

  3. Note to self: Never, ever, ever, call ALICIA- Lici again.

  4. you are entirely right on all points ... i have often deferred to you and gotten wonderful parenting advice/tips even tho your daughter is (gasp) younger than mine (by a whopping 13 or so weeks!). good for you for not putting up with her sh!t.

  5. You should have said well, my kids may be younger but it doesn't take a rocket scientist (or older kids for that matter) to know that one hard fall off a bike with no helmet will indeed lead to brains being splattered all over the road! at least that is what I tell my toddler riding a tricycle, maybe not in so many harsh words but you get the point, You wear your helmet or you don't ride. If I catch you with out it "being strong willed" your bike goes bye-bye maybe she needs to explain it in toddler terms to her "older children" Funny she thought it was a good idea to post a picture of such an event when she was being negligent! Wrtie on lady write on love reading your stuff!


  6. You were not wrong to suggest something so horrible as some idiot putting a helmet on her kid. I frequently tell Kira that when she gets her big girl bike she HAS to wear a helmet to save her head being cracked open like an egg (yes, seriously). Now she can't wait to wear a helmet and is pretty excited about it. Plus, it's a law in Australia anyway, just for that reason.

    What shits me about FB though (even though I really love it) is that it's a medium where people feel justified in slamming you in 3rd person because somehow it's less offensive or some shit. And then OMG they throw the most GIANT of hissy fits when you dare call them on it. (I'm fucking bitter mate, and it's bullshit I deal with DAILY from my (*@&)*$& sister)

    Anyway. Good on you for pointing out her negligence. I would have totally done the same thing, and probably a lot less nicely than you did. :D